Michael: Truth is, identity theft isn't hard. Everybody is always looking for a good one. Michael: A hitman is like a plumber, a dentist or a mechanic. One day, she can name everyone on the National Security Council, the next day, she thinks I work for the post office. Michael: My mother's understanding of my career changes with what she wants from me. Michael: Fiona, you were supposed to stop the car, not blow it into the Everglades! What happened to shorting the ignition? Fiona: You said disable it's not going anywhere.

Everybody's got a history with everybody else. Michael: There's a reason spies don't have a lot of parties. Fiona: You cost me a lot of money, you son of a bitch! I've been wanting to talk to you for a long time! Sam: I cost you? Okay, for starters, what you're talking about never officially happened! Second, you deserved a lot worse than what you got, lady! Michael: Sam. Sam: Oh, Jesus, Mike, you didn't tell me she was gonna be here.

Michael: Uh, listen, Fi, now's not the best time. Identity Michael: Would you put some pants on? Sam Axe: What? I work better when I can breathe down there! There is one good thing about Nigeria, though: it's the gun-running capital of the world, which makes it a bad place to drive a passenger sedan through a crowded market. Michael: Southern Nigeria isn't my favorite place in the world to be it's unstable, it's corrupt, and the people there eat a lot of terrible-smelling preserved fish. Sam: Is that what they're calling it these days? 'Tactical support'? Sam: You sure this is a good idea, you hooking up with her again? Michael: I'm not hooking up with her, okay? I'm not.

Michael: What do you do when an operation goes bad? Not much to do, but smile and try to stay alive. Michael: There is a reason spies have a hard time making friends. Guns make you stupid better to fight your wars with duct tape. Michael: For a job like getting rid of the drug dealer next door, I'll take a hardware store over a gun any day. Still haven't found any defense to Mom crying into my shirt. A rating with every weapon that shoots a bullet or holds an edge. Michael: Well, last time I talked to him he said, 'I'll see you in hell, boy,' so I figured we had something on the books. Madeline Westen: You know you missed your father's funeral. Drop me in the middle of the Gobi Desert, hide me on top of the Himalayas, bury me in a goddamn cave on the moon, and somehow, some way, she’d find a way to call me and ask me for a favor. Michael: My mom would have made a great N.S.A. They think one person cannot make so much problems. They say you're one name for many people. Oleg: Back home, your story Russian Intelligence tells to scare. Oleg: You're real Michael Westen, yes? Michael: Yeah. Never happens in movies, but in real life a busted hand will get you killed. Michael: In a fight, you have to be careful not to break the little bones in your hand on someone’s face. You read magazines, sip coffee, and every once in a while someone tries to kill you. It's good trade craft but it's like hanging out in your dentist's reception area 24 hours a day. Any meeting, any appointment, you have to show up early, make sure you are not followed make sure the area is secured check out the other guy's advance team and see how well he is prepared. Season 1 Pilot Michael: Covert intelligence involves a lot of waiting around.

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